Okay

It was New Year’s Eve! It had already been a year! She was looking at the pictures that once made her happy. The pictures that left a whole inside her and yet, these were the pictures that actually made her feel lighter. This particular one was special. She took a sip on her drink. She held the picture in her hands and couldn’t let go. They were smiling. Why were they smiling?! Was it a joke?! Maybe something funny happened?! Had he tickled her?! Or was it just at the moment?! Why couldn’t she remember that?! Why did they seam happier in that picture than in the others?! She remembered all the other pictures she had torn apart, or set fire on! She had another sip.

She started thinking about that day, the day of the picture. The day they were, so called, happy together!  And then it hit her! That wasn’t because of him! That was the day they had met, but she wasn’t happy because of him. In fact, he wasn’t supposed to be in the picture at all. She just finished her glass! Took a deep breath, and continued thinking.

It was a nice, hot summer day. She had just finished her classes and was planning her vacation. Nothing to do but read at the beach in front of the sea. Her friends had already packed and she just had to stop by her sister’s house to say good-bye and then, Puerto Rico, here I come!

She filled her glass up and took a sip!

Everything was planned: dinner at 6; farewell party by 9; airport by 4 and Puerto Rico by 12! Nothing could go wrong, except for HIM! The tall guy on the other corner, with really tender eyes, broad smile, kinda loving, and a look that you could bet had been molded by the devil himself! She could see the muscles tight on the shirt and she could see that he had it!!! He looked dangerous and yet a pet kitty! He stared for a couple of minutes and she stared back. She saw herself moving towards him and as she was approaching him and his broad smile, THIS THING came in front of her. He was cute, in a kinda adorable way, but not what she was looking for.

She took a big sip and turned on the radio!

She dodged him but the perfect guy was away. She couldn’t find the 6-pack anywhere and turned around. Pretty boy was still there and so they chatted, he paid her drinks, they danced. It was okay! But she couldn’t have okay on her last day in the country! They danced but she was still looking for him! She decided to call the night around midnight and pretty boy decided to accompany her.

Another big sip!

She remembered giggling, but that’s all! At that time, she remembered why she looked so happy! The perfect guy had just smiled at her and she smiled back, that’s when her friend took the picture and pretty boy just happened to be by her side. Fate?! Coincidence?! She didn’t know, but she couldn’t feel love, or any nice feeling towards that picture, or situation. She resented the last year she had thrown away with him, resented the idea of being any longer with him and resented the idea of feeling bad for NOT being with him!

Big sip from the bottle!!

Why did things had to happen the way they did? She settled for okay. She had NEVER settled for okay! What was happening to her?! She had given away her dream trip for okay, her friends for okay. No was she was giving up her life, again for okay.

She closed the bottle! Threw everything in the trash! Called her friends, showered and got ready! This was New Year’s Eve and she was taking the perfect guy now! No settling for okays or fines! She was leaving the party with him … that was HER New Year’s Resolutions! And somehow, she knew he would be there, waiting for her with those tender eyes, broad smile and devilish look, just like a smiley face 🙂