I believe life has stages. We go through the basic ones (childhood, adolescence and adulthood) normally, simply for the fact that it’s part of our natural way of life! But there are other stages in our lives that also have great impact on us! Dating, loving, living, being crushed, surviving!!!
It’s terrible to think of life without a purpose! But it’s even worse to think that during life you share portions of it with people who take it for granted! People who don’t appreciate great small moments of life. Someone once said something like: “choose wisely your companies and friends” People should start using this thought when thinking about a boyfriend/girlfriend (whether your preference is).
For the last seven months I’ve been mourning, wondering where I went wrong, what I should’ve done differently! I know… I broke up, but I’ve been beating up myself for that decision and wondering how I could simply let him go, and give up on a lifetime dream of mine! Because it all seemed too good to NOT be true! I realized that “being alone is not standing the word loneliness because it makes sense. And its sense hurts too much”. And that “it’s the … that kill me, a . would be the clear hardness and end of this story, the … kill me”
They used to, but I came to my senses and reality came along and I realized I wasn’t the one who was wrong and that I didn’t want to turn everyhting around…again… From me all you’re gonna get is friendship and I hope you don’t take THAT for granted!!!
So I decided that it’s my time to mone on! It’s my time to forget about the past and let it go! It’s time to look for a new life, a new meaning and someone who can make me happy just because!
For the past weeks I’ve been having a lot of thinking (you can see that I am kind of a philosopher XD) and something came to my mind! Maybe there a possibility even if it’s the tiniest one of knowing a person WITHOUT commitment, being friends, going out and JUST for the fun! Maybe for each person there is a “soul mate”, that one who’s gonna be yours forever to make you happy for life and beyond – happily ever after! But there must also be that person who you just like to be with because he/she (again whether your preference is) makes you happy. He/she makes you feel better and lighter! I’m not talking about a hooker nor a fling nor anything like that else!!! An acquainted, someone not from your closest circle of friends (because it’s hard even to say few things to them) but a person to listen to you. Listen to all the crap you say, your cryings and even be with you just because he likes it too – just for the fun – WHAT THE HELL!!!
The conditions that these people will show up in your life are totally messed up! They’ll come when you’re vulnerable, depressed and not willing to talk to anyone! He will make you LOL and make you wonder about life and other things. He’ll turn your head upside down and make you stop mourning, complaining and bitching about life! He’ll be the one to make you think of other things rather than the past, rather than what should’ve been but will also give yu many what ifs to think of and make you feel guilty, on the good way. And he’ll probably be there, smiling at you and trying to figure your life you out! The only problem with these people is that they live in a far far away kingdom far from you, so you’ll never get to be hugged, to look into their eyes and see and everlasting friendship, the tenderness, the care adn the desire of something more than just acquaintances! It’s because these of these kind of people that you start smiling to life! They give meaning to the sentence “I found out that it’s worthy to be staring at you for 3 hours even if the world is going crazy out there”
You realize that people are not meant to be alone in this world, we are meant to always have company and have someone around us!
(Obs: Family and friends are important and we can’t disregard the importance of these wonderful kind loving people! But I’m in nother stage)
I’m in a stage where you do not want seriousness…you just want to be !!!
As Tati Bernardi once said:
“I’m a rat trap. Without cheese. Which makes me thing that I only get those who deserve it.”
Simply because the world is lacking people like you –> not someone to be in love with for now but someone just to have fun with 😄